I almost did something for nothing

I did a project with the kids this morning using Borax and pipe cleaners that I found on Pinterest (of course). I see all the great stuff Borax can do and I become inspired!! I have some really awesome All-Clad pots and pans that now look UGLY from all the cooking over the years. Borax says it is great for cleaning pots and pans. Here is a picture of my skillet:

So, I start a scrubbing and a scrubbing and a scrubbing and OUCH......my wrist after 15 minutes was sore and my upper arm was as well. When I say I was a scrubbing, I mean it! What did it accomplish?

So, I could see a difference, but when I do the math 15 min x 7 more of the 8ths of a pan left x recovery time.....I might have a nice clean pot for cooking in NEXT Year!! That of course is if I don't cook in it again until after it has finished its make-over. So, I start to think.....

1. Is anyone going to come do a pot and pan inspection?

2. Are my kids having fun in the other room while I am scrubbing away?

3. Do my kids have enough strength to make this punishment for the fighting going on in the other room?

4. Does food taste any better cooked in a pan with a clean exterior?

5. Am I crazy or something?

With the exception of #5, I answered NO! to all my questions. So, what do I have now? About 1/8 of a Borax cleaned pot, a new sense about cleaning pots, and a lot more free time, because I won't be cleaning my pots anytime soon!

Are the Classics Really Good or is My Memory That Bad?

Today, the boy turned 3. We didn't have much planned, except for some pizza and cake with our houseguests and a couple of friends. It was a rainy yucky day, so we decided to go to lunch and take in a movie. 3 kid choices were playing and I picked The Muppets. I loved The Muppet Show growing up! In 7th grade ceramics, I made a Beaker I still have in the basement bookcase (MeMeMe!) One of my favorites at Christmas time is The Muppet Christmas Carol!

All I can say about the movie was, IT SUCKED!! Whole huge public dance scenes.....REALLY?!?! A weird story line and a weird co-star that still slept in a twin bed in the same room with his puppet brother......REALLY?!?!?! A teacher girlfriend that has a classic car in her classroom that she is teaching her pupils to service. Just plain WEIRD!! So, I ask myself.....were the original Muppets really that good or is my memory just that bad? How many good things came out of the original Jim Henson Muppets? He was brilliant! I wonder if he would approve of the song and dance weirdness I saw today?

Is it just me?

Am I the only person that looks at the Pinterest boards and wants a huge house, calorie burner pills, and unlimited funds? I love so many of the kitchens I see, so why would I just want one? I have found tons of great bedroom ideas for using the eave space in the kids rooms and have decided that they each need about 4 or 5 bedrooms!! The yummy cookies and cupcakes and soups and casseroles and side dishes and salads would be made with style in my new kitchens while I taste test all my works and wash it down with wine and a calorie burner pill! The outdoor living space ideas I see make me want to rent a dozer and go to town on our back 40! Might have to invest in a snow making machine so I can get some of the winter looks I love!

So, anyone want to contribute to the Kim Pinterest Envy Made a Reality Fund?? Cash, check, credit cards, and piggy banks accepted!

All Kinds of Animals at the Zoo, but REALLY.....

The weather was super here in GA today so I decided to use my zoo pass and take the things to see the animals. They love the zoo and all that it has to offer, as do I. Every visit though, I am amazed by the number of daycares there. Today was no exception. I know some people must put their kids in a daycare situation due to circumstances and what not. Hell, we looked into it and decided it would be better to stay home and cut out some of our expenses. For those that do have to put their kids in daycare, I am sure there are those that really investigate their choice of centers. The center I witnessed today must have either been real cheap or had a fake front going when parents visited! If it was the cheap side that sold parents on it, remember....you get what you pay for! If it was a faked scene for visitors, I am here to tell you what really happens at this place. Their were 2 care givers and 8 kids. Each caregiver had a double stroller and 2 kids on leashes. I saw snot like I have never seen and no mind was paid to it. I smelled a poop and it wasn't my boy or an animal. In the Gorilla arena, where they parked it for sometime, one of the caregivers was sharing her can of Coke with 2 of the kids. Now this might not seem bad to some who do not have kids, but to me, I had to hold myself back from saying something. What this Trucker turned Momma really wanted to say:

1. If you cannot control the kids in your care without the use of leash, then don't take them out. This isn't the fucking dog park! It is a zoo and a nice one at that.

2. If a kid had snot dripping into his mouth, they sell these things at not only WallyWorld, but most every convenience store around. They are called tissues. Hell, the bathroom at the zoo has TP!! Wipe that poor kid's nose and show him that at the least, you don't think he is a dog even though you are walking him on a leash! I understand it is cold and maybe the kid should not have been sent to daycare, but maybe he should have been in the stroller and not wiping his green slime all over!!

3. If I can smell a poop and I am not right on top of you, then this place must be so bad off that the caregivers are immune to the smell. Don't make that kid walk around or sit in his/her own shit!! Clean the ass up and then go back to walking them like a dog.

4. Coke will stunt your growth! (At least that used to be one of the old sayings from my youth.) A Coke has never touched the lips of my 4yr old girl and will not for many years to come! There are many great drinks for kids....MILK, WATER, and maybe on a special occasion JUICE. The Coke was only 1/2 of the issue. It was also being SHARED!! God only knows if the snot faced kid had also been given a drink!

Parents, open your eyes! Go see what is going on at the daycare, preschool, or school where you send your child!! You have every right to drop in unannounced and observe! If you see something out of place or out of sorts.....ASK!! You are trusting these people with the future of your care!! I want to make sure my kids know they are loved so when I need to be fed or changed in my senior citizen years, it is done with love and tenderness instead of being ignored, treated like a dog, or given stuff that would rot the teeth I have left out of my mouth.

Cry for Attention

I saw someone out today while I was running errands (with my kids in tow of course) that I don't really know. I do, however, know her child and have seen her on occasion at the gym where I attempt to work-out. She of course was too self absorbed to notice me, but I think everyone noticed her. Here are some Trucker turned Momma observations:

~High heel platform boots are for hookers and pole dancers. If you are going to Target, I am thinking you are not on the clock!

~Your make-up and hair must have taken you hours! I don't care to spend that time on myself and would rather have my kids hanging with me and playing and enjoying them, because they are my kids and will only be kids for so long!

~Your one outfit (hooker boots, designer jeans, ugly sweater, and fancy purse) must have cost you more than my monthly mortgage payment!! I would rather save my $$$ for my kids education and wear shit from Target, Land's End and L.L.Bean.


~The hours I have seen you spend in the gym might pay-off, but my fat ass goes long enough to get my 30 min in and then focus on other things, like the 2 kids I have already sent to school 3 mornings a week and just thrown in the gym nursery for my 30 minutes of me time.


~Your kids are not part of your accessory collection and yet, you seem to treat them as such. This leads to the behavior issues I have witnessed. I don't pick when to parent, but parent all the time, because it is my JOB! Maybe if you look to self and see how self centered you are, you would realize the dis-service you are doing for your kids. All they want is some attention and they will do what they have to to get it. Often this comes in the form of misbehaving at the expense of other kids.

Now, I DO NOT claim to be any kind of expert, but I often look to my kids and the job my parents did with my sister and me as an example. My kids are usually fairly well behaved. They don't usually get in big trouble. They are usually pretty happy go lucky! Of course, they have their moments, as we all do, but their moments are not a HUGE issue for others nor do they tend to stretch for an entire time while in school or while we are out. I hope that my beliefs are right on, but if you think you need to rock the hooker look, lead a life for yourself, and have kids that are hellish, you go on! I will read about your serial killer while I am hanging with my well adjusted doctoral candidate children. (I can dream they will be something beyond a college grad driving a truck!)

I can be happy!

So, some friends commented on my last post that I am always so angry. My Blog is called The Rantings of a "Trucker turned Momma" and not some gleaming title that makes everyone feel so wonderful about everything! It is who I am!

There are things that make me smile. Lots of things actually! (Besides my kids, even!)

~I love it when some dumbass weaves in and out of traffic and drives like an idiot only to have me (whom he just passed and then cut off to pass someone else) pull up beside him at the next red light.

~I love it when someone pays a compliment to my kid and she says "Thanks, my Mom made it on her own sewing machine!" After that, they look at me and I can see the look on their face speak volumes of disbelief!

~I love it when I make business phone calls or order parts or even take a truck into a shop and people think a woman knows nothing about a truck and they try to play me as dumb!

~I love it when I see my dumbass neighbor struggle to back his trailer in his driveway and then look at me in disbelief when I back our camper down the driveway without a pull-up!

~I love it when I find a match for a sock I have had sitting around for a month or so. Although this is joyous, it also pisses me off wondering where that stray sock had been and who in this house hides shit on me!

~I love it when I try a new recipe but tweak it and my husband says that he loves it but the next time I make it, I tweak it a little differently and he says it is better that the last time!

Maybe it is me, because I just don't get it!

A friend asked me a week or so ago if I had Christmas pajamas for the kids to wear and look cute in for Christmas Eve and Christmas morning. Ummmm....Never occurred to me!! I think my kids look cute in the mismatched jammies that were from last year and are ready for the flood!! You think my kids will remember anything beyond what they got for Christmas? I sure as hell don't remember if my sister and I ever had matching special Christmas pajamas!





This isn't the only thing I don't get, so I have decided it must just be me!





I do not get that evil looking elf that you have to move every night. I feel bad enough lying to my kids about Santa and holding it over their head, but to add something else to my list to try to remember to do.....FORGET IT!





I do not get how people search and search for the best deal and the perfect gift. My ass sat on my couch and pointed and clicked my way thru Christmas shopping. If someone does not think it is perfect, then so be it. Don't use the shit, but make sure you tell me, so I won't waste my time on you next year! See, to me, my time is of value and I would much rather spend it doing something fun and I do not enjoy shopping!





I do not get dragging a ton of shit out of the attic/basement for a month to make anything look pretty. I am slightly jealous of people that are able to pull this off, but I am not one of them nor do I have the patience to attempt it!





I do not get waiting with the masses to see Christmas lights or paying to see them. We have several places nearby that are free and win top award on our tacky light tour!!





I do not get glitter as a decorating item. I will suck glitter up for the next 6 mo. from bows, ornaments, cards and kids. My husband has left in a nice clean uniform covered with glitter from a stupid pair of pants the girl child had to have. He looked like a drag queen all shiny and flashy!





I do not get being all fixed up for every event every day. I don't own a single tube of lipstick, let alone many shades for various seasons or outfits or event types. Burt's Bees lip balm is my friend.





I do not get buying my kids 10 pairs of shoes. The girl has several pairs, but only one good pair that I paid good money for. Then she has a pair of winter crocs, a pair of tennies, and a couple hand-me-downs. The boy has 2 pairs of shoes. A pair of winter crocs and a pair of tennies. They are kids, they will only wear them for 1/2 a year and then they will be destroyed or too small.





I do not get having good clothes and play clothes for my kids. We have clothes for them. All they do is play, so I guess all they have are play clothes. If it doesn't go in the washing machine and dryer, I don't buy it. I hardly buy anything new for my kids and I don't feel guilty about it. Really, consignment is the only way I go or I make them for the girl. I might fill in a gap here or there, but does anyone really care? I sure don't! Clothes do not make my kids cute.

I do not get why people have to brag about the name brand of their clothes or items. My coat (until last year) was still the FedEx one I used to wear when I was still driving! My shoes are Dansko knock-offs. I will never own a Coach purse and really don't give a shit if you do! My dog is a full blooded lab, FROM the POUND! My kids destroy everything, so it doesn't matter if it is from Target, consignment or Gap. My house will never have a Pottery Barn look to it because my life is about function, not look.

AGAIN, I do not get stuff, so I guess it is just me!